Eight years ago I started using crystal meth. I dropped out of high school and ran away from home. I started living with some friends of mine and began to live my life for my next hit. Then my roommates decided to move on and get jobs. I had no desire to do that. Where did drugs fit in with work? How could I get high, if I was working all the time? Shortly after I turned eighteen I met the father of my children. He was nice and had the same interest as I did, how do I get my next hit turned into, how do we get high today? A few months passed and I had already fallen in love with him… In October of that year he hit me. I was running down the street covered in blood and someone saw me and called the police. They took him to jail and three days later he was out and begging me to take him back. This was something that I never thought would happen to me, but I was lost in a world of darkness and could not find the light at the end of the tunnel. So the fights got worse, and the beatings got worse. Four black eyes, two busted lips, and a concussion (or three) later and he was back in jail. I was alone. He got out and found me again. Shortly afterwards, I found out that I was pregnant. I stopped using and went to my doctors appointments. Then he started telling me that the baby wasn’t his. The abuse never stopped. Eventually I couldn’t go to the doctor because I wasn’t allowed to leave or go anywhere. I stayed with him and had a total of three children with him. In November of 2006 he tried to kill me and our unborn daughter. Still I took him back. The devil was in him and I had no hope. My kids and I suffered. On January 8, 2007 he went to jail and was going to go away for a long time. That day I feared for my life and the lives of my children. In the months following I fell into a deep depression and allowed another man to move into my home. I ended up losing my kids and trying to take my own life. I started using speed again. I lost my apartment, all of my belongings, and my family.

I met this guy named Bob and we both liked to get high and got along really well. In October of 2007 we ended up living in the desert on Russell Rd. Then we heard about this guy named Walter who goes to the park and feeds the homeless. All he asks for in return is 20 minutes of your time for him to share the gospel of Jesus with you. So, Bob and I decided to go. At first we didn’t go. But as we began to care for each other we decided that something needed to change. So we started to go to the service in the park. At first it was about the food. Soon the food didn’t matter and all we wanted was The Word. I found myself on my knees in the desert crying and asking the Lord to come into my life and change me. On March 23, 2008 we gave our lives to Christ. And started living our lives only for Jesus. As we got to know our Lord better he began changing our lives little by little. Bob and I became closer and our love for each other grew with our love for Jesus. We helped each other read our scripture and as we read the drugs eventually disappeared from our lives. In July we moved out of the desert. We never missed a park service and never let a day go by without reading. In November my mom and I got back in touch. I went a took my GED test and passed. I have a job and I now get to see my kids. When I first came to the lord I prayed to just get to talk to my kids again. Everything I have ever prayed for has been given to me. I still go to the park services but now instead as a participant, I am a volunteer. My life is lived for the glory of our Lord, Jesus Christ and my life if proof that all you need to do is give everything up to Him and you will be changed forever. If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has gone and the new has come. Knees down, hands up, Jesus, if you’re real, come into my life and change me. Be ready for Him to come in and take your hand and lead on the path of righteousness. Be ready for your life to change. I was. Thank you Jesus.

I found this verse useful when it seemed like everything was against me, Romans 5:3-5 " we should rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character, and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.